Cooking Healthful Joyful Meals With a Picky Family

Shifting from a convenient but unhealthy diet to one of healthful, delicious joy can be a challenge when you’re living alone — but there’s a whole new level of challenge if you are part of a family.

The problem: while you might want to change to a new style of eating, picky eaters (kids, but also spouses) can disagree with the change.

Who wants to eat kale when fried chicken and pizza are go-to staples? Who wants to eat oats and fruit when Poptarts and sausages are the usual breakfast foods?

Well, me. And maybe you. But how do we deal with a family full of picky eaters?

A woman in my Sea Change Program asked me:

“I’ve got 2 kids who are picky and a husband who doesn’t generally like vegetables and really hates having the same meal 2 nights in a row. I know that you have a big family and I’m sure there’s someone in your household that is picky. 😉 How has this impacted the way you or your wife meal plans? I really want to simplify my grocery list and for all of us to eat healthier.”

So … I don’t claim to have all the answers. We have been somewhat successful here (with our family of 8), but it took a while, and in truth, we still have plenty of picky eaters in our family.

That said, I’ll share what has worked for us:

  1. We try to find things that the whole family likes that are healthy and tasty. That might mean veggie tacos, veggie spaghetti (with whole wheat noodles if we can get away with it), sushi bowls, anything they might all like.
  2. Other times, we cook something less healthy that they would like, and either join them or cook our own meals (which we might make to last for a few days).
  3. We often make a lot of food for the family dinner and then have leftovers for lunch, and possibly another dinner or two (like a big pot of soup or chili). If your husband doesn’t like the same dinner twice in a row, he might be open to having it again in a few days.
  4. We talk to the kids and try to get them to explore foods they don’t always like. This doesn’t always work, though. But it’s worth an ongoing conversation. You might try this with your husband as well. It helps to cook the vegetables in different ways that make them tastier, just to get them to open up to it. For example, if they don’t like kale, they might enjoy kale chips (baked with olive oil to a crisp, with seasonings).
  5. Sometimes we cook a dish that has something one of the kids doesn’t like (mushrooms, for example), but we cook the mushrooms on the side, and allow them to leave off the mushrooms. This can get complicated but sometimes it’s not too hard.
  6. If someone doesn’t like the dinner, they can just have a little of it and then make themselves a PB&J sandwich or grilled cheese or something. Our kids can cook simple things for themselves.
  7. Finally, we get everyone involved in the meal planning. Everyone looks for meal ideas online. Vote on what to eat. Take one meal a week to cook themselves. If they cook it, they’re likely to eat it!

 

You don’t have to do all of these, but there might be a couple of ideas here that work for you.

In the end, embrace the Zen Habits philosophy of small, gradual change. You don’t have to do all of this overnight. But there’s also the Zen Habits philosophy of loving the change you’re creating — how can you show them that this is a joyful change to delicious nutritiousness?

Original article appeared at Zen Habits. Reprinted with permission.

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Adman

Adman from Callner Brothers on Vimeo.

WRITER/DIRECTOR: Ben Callner
PRODUCER: Adam Callner
EP’s: Ben Callner, Adam Callner, Steve Wi, Phyllis Koenig, Doug Chamberlain, Melissa Mapes, Ben Suenaga
DP: Doug Chamberlain
PRODUCTION DESIGNER: Christian Stone
EDITORS: Ben Callner, Joe Kell, Alex Pirrone, Ben Suenaga

PRODUCTION COMPANY: Raucous Content
POST PRODUCTION: Friendshop
COLOR CORRECT: MPC NYC
SOUND DESIGN/MIX: Tunewelders

CAST: Ted Cannon, Jocelin Donahue, Judy Kain, Dar Dixon, Jarrod Crawford, Tim Karasawa, Josh Covitt, Erick Chavarria, Bill O’Neill, Sam Carson, Niko Posey, David Aaron, Paul Vinson, Michele Lainevool, Adam Nemet, Harrison Polo

Thank you to everyone else involved! If “it takes a village,” this took a major metropolitan area.


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LGBTQ+ Folk, Tolerance, and God’s ‘Great Plan’

The many different variations of gender and sexual identity we encounter in our society today are a part of God’s great plan. If they weren’t, they wouldn’t exist at all. Some people say that homosexuality exists to test our faith. They suggest it is here to tempt us, as the devil is said to tempt people, to betray the laws of morality. But, homosexuality and gender fluidity are, simply, not immoral.

But what purpose does morality serve anyway?

Morality is a set of rules that we live by in order to keep society working and flourishing. They act as guidelines that keep us from plunging into chaos. Right now, however, what plunges us into chaos is global climate change and our inability to love one another in spite of–and because of–our differences. If we can’t look past our own noses long enough to see that we are all in the same boat together, then climate change will sink us–boat and all.

Once upon a time, our survival would have been threatened if people didn’t reproduce quickly enough on a yearly basis. On average, people died younger than we do today. Many of them perished before they never got a chance to grow up and pass on their genes. They died from a lack of sanitation and preventable diseases (at least today). Also, they succumbed to simple accidents of hard living, such as being crushed by trees or eaten by wild animals. Life was much harder then, obviously. So, it makes sense, from the standpoint of human survival, that the morality of yesteryear would have frowned upon homosexuality. The church telling people it was God’s will that they have as many children as possible made sense. Any other perspective could have facilitated the snuffing out of humans forever.

But today, the ‘face’ of the greatest danger to continued human existence on this planet has changed? It is us. We are our own worst enemy. There are too many of us, using too many of Earth’s finite resources.

Homosexuality and non-binary genders, however, may be one of God’s methods of correcting this planet’s imbalance. If we don’t welcome and accept God’s ‘gentle ways’, then God will rush in with catastrophic corrections and the ecosystem, itself, will balance itself out. Of course, this would happen at humankind’s painful and devastating expense.

We must reframe our views on homosexuality and gender fluidity. Not only should we be tolerant of our LGBTQ neighbors because we should love our neighbors as we love ourselves, but we should also be exultant in the knowledge that such diversity plays into God’s ‘great plan’ to keep the Earth a healthy, safe ecosystem. If we cannot adjust our sense of morality to include and celebrate homosexuality and gender differences, then we are not only sinning against each other, we are forsaking God’s will.

Ultimately, homosexuality is not enough of a force to reverse global climate change. It is surely a piece of God’s great puzzle, though. Furthermore, if we ignore divine messages about our impact on this ecosystem and the need to change our ways, then God will rain down retribution in the form of increased storms, famine, and drought– and then the hand of God will not be so gentle nor so kind.

Remember, we were made in God’s image and God is neither man nor woman. God transcends our concepts of gender. “And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness.” (Genesis 1:26)

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We Aren’t America Anymore

At this point, those of us who live in the United States are at an inflection point in the Rule of Law. Are you and I equal citizens, born to inalienable rights in a democratic society… or is the President of the United States elevated above us by being appointed to his office? What I argue is that we specifically built a society—one that was so important to the founders that they abandoned their cultural and political history to declare WAR upon their government—that NO man is above the law.

If we read the Mueller report, not the pundit’s take on Fox or CNN, but the report itself; it lays out a pretty good case that but for a single opinion within the Justice Department, Donald Trump would have been indicted on charges of obstruction of justice.

So we have to ask ourselves as a people—not as Democrats and Republicans—but as a people… do we have one rule of law for those in power, and one for those who aren’t… or are we equal citizens who bow to no monarch?

Look at the trust destroyed by police officers who suffer no consequence in unjustified killings. Entire communities believe, rightly or wrongly, it is what they believe, that the police are not there to protect them. That the police are unaccountable to the law when they murder citizens of their community.

Now apply that same problem to the Federal Government... rightly or wrongly, does an unaccountable Executive protect the American People or protect his own interests? Does that trickle down to the other branches of government, or the cabinet? Can we accept a King accountable to no law? Leaders have quite literally been beheaded for this very problem, or forced to sign the Magna Carta saying that it would never be a problem again…

I’m not arguing for the overthrow of the government, I’m arguing for the government to exercise it’s constitutionally mandated responsibility for oversight, protecting and preserving the rule of law. If we “move on” from the Mueller report with no action… we aren’t America anymore.



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Mysterious Fires are Breaking out in the Pridelands in ‘Fire From the Sky’

fire from the sky, the lion guard, tv show, animated, adventure, season 2, review, disney junior

Someone is causing fires to break out in ‘Fire From the Sky’

The Pridelands have had it rough this season. Not only is the dry season going on, but Scar is back and causing chaos all over the place. The Lion Guard has had their hands full stopping every plan he has hatched. Now deadly fires are breaking out all over the Pridelands in ‘Fire From the Sky’. I was able to watch a screener of this episode and here is what I thought of it.

fire from the sky, the lion guard, tv show, animated, adventure, season 2, review, disney junior

(c) Disney Junior

You can read the plot for ‘Fire From the Sky’ here:

To combat the vultures dropping flame sticks from the sky, the Lion Guard seeks help from Hadithi and a Martial eagle named Anga.

John O’Hurley (“Seinfeld”) returns as Hadithi and Bryana Salaz (“The Voice”) guest stars as Anga.

fire from the sky, the lion guard, tv show, animated, adventure, season 2, review, disney junior

(c) Disney Junior

The Pridelands face another threat in ‘Fire From the Sky’. Ono tries to find out who is behind it, but sadly can’t fly high enough. So Beshte decides to introduce The Lion Guard to a friend he thinks can help. They are able to find out who the culprit, but it is clear they will need help to take them down. The Lion Guard go to see Hadithi who is happy to help out anyway he can. With all the birds of the Pridelands banded together it may be enough to stop this new plan before great harm is brought to the Pridelands. If you have enjoyed this season so far you won’t want to miss this episode. If you want to learn more about The Lion Guard click on this website.

The Lion Guard ‘Fire From the Sky’ airs Monday April 22nd at 2pm. You can follow this show on Facebook.

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3 Ways to Remove the Hustle From Your Business Through the Power of Automation

If you’re anything like me, when building your business online you may see asking for help or taking short cuts as cheating. I can’t explain why but when I first launched my business online, I wanted so badly to be able to do everything for myself. It gave me more of a sense of achievement, and I worked many extra hours than I probably needed to trying to do everything myself.

The admin, content creation, marketing, prospecting, web design…I’m sure you get the picture. But it all came to a head when I would burn myself out time and time again. I kept hitting a wall where my business was concerned as there was only 1 of me and only limited hours in the day.

I got bored of the hustle and thought there must be a much simpler way to build and market a business online. Especially as I was a single mother, looking after my child when I wasn’t running a business single handedly. That’s when I discovered something that not only gave me back my freedom but also transformed my business, bringing in enough revenue within 8 weeks to enable me to leave the day job and become a work from home mum.

It was the power of automation!

I looked all around me as well at the other mum’s building their businesses online but desperately struggling to make ends meet and wearing themselves out. I knew there was a way to simplify my sales and business processes.

Here are my top 3 recommended tools to start removing the hustle from your business today:

1. Messenger marketing

I use Manychat which is a messenger marketing platform which enables you to market to your subscribers directly through Facebook messenger. The ways in which you can use this incredible technology is endless but I will name a few ways in which you can use this in your business.

Automate your sales process! You can build a sales funnel with a messenger bot that can take your prospects through a warm up sequence, build the relationship with them, showcase all of your products and services and even take payments on autopilot.

You can register people for online events or training sessions using your messenger bot, communicate with everyone simultaneously and provide any updates direct to their messenger.

Do you have a membership, team or group of people you need to communicate with? Create a messenger bot specifically for them to enable you to communicate with everyone directly at the same time with just 1 click of a button. Subscription messages can also be sent and scheduled in advance.

“The first rule of any technology used in a business is that automation applied to an efficient operation will magnify the efficiency. The second is that automation applied to an inefficient operation will magnify the inefficiency.” – Bill Gates

2. Email marketing

Another form of digital marketing, email marketing has been around for some time but still very much has a place in today’s marketing world. You can use a lead page/landing page and an account with an email provider to automate all aspects of your sales process and communicate regularly with your subscribers.

Treat your list well, provide them with valuable content and you can build a tribe of loyal followers. If you match this with an ongoing ad campaign you have the ability to be making sales on autopilot.

Set your automation up and you can take your leads through your whole sales process and all the way up your product/service value ladder. If you sell digital products such as courses, this allows you to be earning a residual income whilst you sleep.

3. Automate your social media content

Zapier is the most incredible workflow automation tool I have ever come across. Allowing you to create automations between most apps that you can use online. For example, if you use spreadsheets, you can create a trigger every time a new entry is entered on your google sheet with an email address, they automatically get added to your mailing list and sent automated emails.

My favourite zap (an automation created between 2 apps) is between Trello and Buffer. You can connect both apps together in a seamless way which allows you to plan your social media content in Trello, write your content, set the date you wish the content to post, add an image and this will automatically send all of the information to your Buffer account and schedule the post for your social media accounts.

Even more incredible is that this system works across multiple platforms so you can use it to schedule content for Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, LinkedIn and Instagram all at the same time.

“Automation and technology don’t cure behavioural ruts; they just create new instances of them.” – Kenneth Goldsmith

I can’t even begin to tell you how much my life has changed since implementing these into my business. In just 3 months my income increased by 500%. So it’s time to relax and start implementing some automation into that business of yours. The hustle is all a myth.

source https://addicted2success.com/entrepreneur-profile/3-ways-to-remove-the-hustle-from-your-business-through-the-power-of-automation/

Make the Change One Commitment at a Time

Every once in a while a client will get really frustrated and exclaim “I’ve failed!” My first response is usually “Congratulations!” I say that because failure is one of the key ingredients to real learning.

We eliminate what doesn’t work. We hone and better ourselves.

Secondly, I follow up with a reminder. “Use one of those Re-Commitment cards I gave you.”

We both laugh.

Somehow we have come to believe we are infallible machines. Mechanical to work perfectly. We believe our code is so exceptional. How could we possibly mess up?

Through Failure, We Learn.

You get 500
Re-Commitment cards in your booklet.

Each time something goes awry, grab one and proudly use it.

Thomas Edison is often cited as the inventor of the lightbulb. He was not. However, he did figure out how to sustain the lightbulb’s ability to last longer before burning out.

He spent countless hours through trial-and-error experiments to get the thickness of the filament and voltage regulation just right. One could only imagine how frustrated Edison must have been at times.

There are so many wonderful quotes attributed to Edison and his healthy perspective on failure as a growth mindset.

“I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”

“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”

“Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.”

Pretty good for an inventor whose teacher considered him “too stupid to learn anything.” Ironic for an inventor who was awarded 1,093 patents.

There are countless other Edison-like individuals out there who under all adversity strove to continue forward— the basketball player who initially failed to make his high school varsity team and went on to become one of NBA’s greatest athletes (Michael Jordon); 4 shaggy-haired lads from Liverpool who failed to get a record contract early on (Beatles); the single welfare mother who against all odds followed her inner guidance to write and has since sold 500 million+ books (JK Rowlings.)

Stand Out By Standing Up.

The way we create change is through action. Stand up.

In comedy improvisation, there is a tradition when you hit the wall and snafu the scene. You simply take a self-congratulatory bow and exclaim in an over-exaggerated manner, “I faiiiiiiled.” The audience applauds as a form of support, as in, regardless, what a brilliant effort you made!

Years ago, in one of my many free-flowing incarnations, I was a professional photographer. On assignment for Guitar World magazine, I spent several days photographing a group of incredible guitarists who came together to celebrate the music of Stevie Ray Vaughan for a television special. This included so many of the blues greats including his brother Jimmie Vaughan, BB King, Buddy Guy, Robert Cray, Bonnie Raitt, and Eric Clapton.

As a guitarist myself, I was stupefied watching Clapton rehearse. Believe it or not, he kept messing up the song. How was this possible? Here was a guitarist who was so revered, that the phrase “Clapton is God” was once spray-painted on the wall of the London underground and all over the city.

As the tension built in the room and most notably on Clapton’s face, I turned to Jimmie with a look of WTF? Jimmie leaned over to me and in a hushed tone said, “Just you wait. Eric will go back to his hotel room tonight and practice that song over and over. You’ll see tomorrow when he comes back.”

And that is exactly what happened. At the following day’s rehearsal, Clapton plugged in his Stratocaster, turned it up without apology, and then matched SRV’s original guitar lead while tearing the roof off!

Focus On The Opportunity

What exactly did Clapton do? As plain as day, he Re-Committed. Sure he was initially flustered, but he wasn’t going to let that rule the situation. He wasn’t about to let an embarrassing moment stifle his expression. He wanted to honor his friend and fellow bluesman.

This was a public celebration that was going to be broadcasted to millions of viewers. In the end, during the performance in front of a live audience, Clapton floored everyone. The fruits of his Re-Commitment was so evident.

Use That Re-Commitment Card

Normally in the first several weeks of working with a new client, the opportunity to present the mythical Re-Commitment booklet will avail.

Someone will blurt out something like “I really screwed up this situation” or “I keep beating myself up because of…”

When this happens, I reach over for my handy stack of blank 4×6 index cards and say with a smile. “This stack of cards represents a booklet of 500 Re-Commitment vouchers I am giving you. Whenever you fall off track, or think you are failing, use one. It’s a learning ‘get out free of your own jail’ card. Just Re-Commit. For any new habit or change of mindset, you may not need to use all of them. But remember they are your disposal for whenever they are needed.”

Establishing a new mindset or change of habit is a process. It will take repetition to establish. Stop beating yourself up or having a pity party when you go off course. If you really take this seriously and see it as an opportunity, then things will change. Make this your light bulb moment, just like Edison.

How will you use your 500 Re-Commitment cards?

Previously published here and reprinted with the author’s permission.

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Four Ways to Turn Introversion Into a Leadership Asset

In her bestselling book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, Susan Cain explains how in the twentieth century, extroversion became a cultural value—one that resulted in the conflation of success and outgoingness, likeability and talkativeness. Consequently, “introversion—along with its cousins sensitivity, seriousness, and shyness—is now a second-class personality trait, somewhere between a disappointment and a pathology.” However, as she notes, pointing to figures like Sir Isaac Newton, Rosa Parks, Steven Spielberg, Dr. Seuss, and J. K. Rowling as examples of high-achieving introverts, “we make a grave mistake to embrace the Extrovert Ideal so unthinkingly. Some of our greatest ideas, art, and inventions…came from quiet and cerebral people who knew how to tune in to their inner worlds and the treasures to be found there.”

The Extrovert Ideal has long shaped assumptions about what effective leadership looks like: good leaders, according to the prevailing wisdom, are loquacious, loud, and quick to act. But as Dr. Rick Goodman suggests in his new book The Solutions Oriented Leader: Your Comprehensive Guide to Achieve World-Class Results, introversion can be a huge asset, rather than a liability, for success in leadership. He writes: “One of the main things that holds introverts back, I think, is the perception that those who are quiet, even shy, cannot make commanding figures.”

To break through misperceptions about introversion and tap into its power for leadership greatness, implement the following four strategies:

1. Remember that listening—not talking—is the mark of a really engaging leader.

Despite the assumption that the most effective leaders are the ones who talk the most, active listening is a far more important leadership skill. Indeed, Goodman notes that potentially the most significant challenge faced by today’s business leaders is positioning yourself “to lead your team not just through commands and dictations but through real engagement.” Meaningful engagement requires not listening to respond, but listening to understand, a communication skill at which introverts are particularly adept.

2. Remain calm during times of crisis.

Introverts, with their tendency to calmly, internally process situations before responding, can diffuse emotional situations by offering deliberate, rational, and well-thought-out solutions.

3. Force yourself out of your comfort zone.

Although you might prefer small-group situations to large speaking events and value deep, meaningful conversation over small talk, to be an effective leader you’ll want to push yourself a bit to engage with others in the ways that matter to them. Play to your strengths, making the most of those more intimate conversational settings, but also challenge yourself to step out of your comfort zone in order to grow as a leader.

4. Allow yourself some quiet time.

Contrary to popular belief, introversion does not mean that you don’t like others or you’re antisocial; in fact, introverts can be quite social beings—in measured doses. What distinguishes introverts from extroverts is that being around others saps their energy rather than boosting it; as such, introverts require time alone to recharge their batteries. Creating space for this—whether by setting aside fifteen minutes in the morning to be by yourself and collect your thoughts for the day, taking a time-out during the workday to fill up your energy reserves, or using another recovery strategy—will help improve your impact as a leader.

Introversion can and should be a valued quality in business, and those who are introverted should not feel limited in their professional growth opportunities. The intentionality and thoughtfulness that are marks of introversion can make for truly transformative leaders.

What’s your take on what you just read? Comment below or write a response and submit to us your own point of view or reaction here at the red box, below, which links to our submissions portal.

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7 Dating Do’s and Don’ts!

First, I want to remind you of something. Dating is a gift. Stop, I know. I have horror stories myself. I’ve “wasted” a lot of time and energy on people who didn’t “pan out”. There’s been false advertising. Mismatches. Weirdness. Miscommunication. I’ve been in the battlefield. I get it. But here’s the thing. It’s not about something panning out. Stop focusing on finding your soulmate. There’s way too much pressure there. Dating is about exploration. Exploring a new soul but also yourself.

When two people collide, there is so much more than love potential and you finding “the one”. There is learning, new experiences, shifts in perspective, and new possible definitions. It doesn’t matter if it’s one date or six months. It’s a great chance to learn and discover or rediscover love and for course, yourself. Yes, people can get hurt. That’s the buy-in. But that should never be a reason why you stop exploring love.

Dating is a part of life and it can be a growth experience with the right mindset.

Here are seven dos and don’ts in the early stages of dating to give yourself that experience.

1. Do use some real f*cking pictures.

Let’s get rid of the word catfish so it’s not in our vocabulary anymore. Because behind every time someone uses that word, there is someone who feels ripped off, discouraged, and tired of dating. It’s happened to me and the drive home is not cool. She didn’t just not look like her photos. It was like meeting Drew Barrymore but Drew Carey showed up. I didn’t recognize her at all. But I still made the best of it. Here’s the question you should ask yourself. Would you rather they be pleasantly surprised or secretly disappointed? If all your photos are the best photos you’ve ever taken in your life, you will be starting with your date being disappointed. Now you better be charming AF to dig yourself out of that hole.

2. Do ask questions / don’t talk about yourself the entire time on the first date.

Usually, the more we like someone, the more talkative we are. And when we’re talkative, we can easily get into a talking loop instead of a nice back and forth flow of conversation. So if you’re feeling the date, make sure you ask them questions. It shows that you’re interested. But more importantly that you have self-awareness.

Topics to avoid on the first date.

How much you hate the dating process. You’re going to indirectly pee all over the date. No need to mention what everyone already knows.

Religion and politics, obviously. I mean you can touch upon various topics under that umbrella. But you’re not trying to convince someone to change their personal viewpoints. You’re just getting to know someone so stay on your side of the fence. It can quickly become sticky and you can write people off pretty fast.

Past relationships. Wait. I actually think is okay to talk about this as long as you’re sharing learnings and revelations. Not going on and on about the one that got away. A healthy conversation about relationships is a great way to learn about what someone thinks about relationships and what’s important to them. Just don’t make the entire conversation about all your exes.

Everything you hate about your life. Don’t turn your first date into a therapy session. Yes, you can talk about where you’re at in life and some of your frustrations but venting about all your life problems on the first date isn’t going to make people want to be in your life.

3. Do drop expectations/checklists.

The more expectations you have, the steeper the cliffs you will be creating. You can have some expectations later once it turns into something or there’s a conversation about the future and what both of you want. But expectation is earned. They take time. Right now, you should be in discovery mode. You’re getting to know someone. Not expecting them to be someone. (Well, that should never be the case). Having expectations and checklists will encourage judgment and make you narrow. The whole point of dating is to be wide, throw the widest mental net you can so you can experience new types of people that you haven’t experienced before. Through this experience-stretch, there will be learning. You will learn what works, what doesn’t work, what you want, don’t want. The only way to learn about these things is to actually experience them. And I think that’s why dating gets such a bad wrap. We only expect great things. But we need to experience all of it, the good, the bad, and the ugly. It’s through all of this where the true gift of dating lives.

4. Do show yourself.

If you pretend to be someone you’re not, you’ll just be kicking yourself in the a** when they realize you’re not who they thought you were. I get that in the beginning you want to show your best self, especially if you’re into someone. And I get that it takes time to completely show ourselves. I mean we’re not going to act how we would around our best friends and siblings. But ultimately, as you guys peel the layers, you have to show your true self. You have to show who you are, shirt comings and all. You have to be you. On purpose. If not, it’s called false advertising.

5. Do Communicate.

You have a responsibility to communicate your feelings. Of course not on the first date or few dates. I’m talking about if the dates turn into dating. Through the dating process, as you get closer to each other and spend more and more time. Most people don’t communicate their feelings due to fear. But without communication, dating becomes a guessing game with an emphasis on game. And whenever we play games, there is hurt, anger, and resentment.

Communication doesn’t just mean to express where you want to go for dinner or what you like in bed. It means to express your state and where you’re at. Yes, your feelings. How are you feeling? What’s coming up for you? Express your fears and concerns. Dating itself is a mini-relationship. Do it together instead of alone. Or like any relationship, there will be drift.

Note: But there are some things you should talk to your therapist or dating coach about. As things come up, because things will, you are responsible for your own sh*t. Triggers. Resistance. Whatever. You have to decide what should be shared and processed with who you’re dating and what needs to be processed with a therapist. But you can and should let who you’re dating know that you’re struggling with some things and are working on it with a therapist. I believe that’s responsible and shows effort.

6. Don’t worry if he or she is “the one”.

We (including myself) put way too much weight on if someone’s “the one”. For me, it’s an age thing. I’m forty-five and feel like I’m running out of time. But this only puts pressure on myself and the relationship, pulling you out of the present and living in logic and criticism. In a nutshell, it prevents the space for magic and the natural unfolding. Instead, it’s become like buying car. Yes, there is a chance someone can be the next big chapter of your life. Or not. But if you’re constantly wondering if they are or not, they won’t be.

6. Do wait for it…

Many jump ship way too fast. Movies have programmed us to believe that if we don’t feel the lightning in the bottle, it’s not real. I’ve learned that that’s not true. Actually, I believe the opposite. The “lightning in the bottle” most of the times means the dynamic can be unhealthy. That “lightning” is most likely coming from past and wiring. For example, addicts/al-anon. Their attraction is magnetic. It runs deep and most likely comes from the past, upbringing -> wiring. Not what’s real and present. Onion over the apple. Truly sustainable attraction comes in peeling layers.

7. Don’t protect your heart

What?! Why would anyone not protect their heart? Well, it’s like life. You can protect yourself by living behind your fear walls and you’ll end up creating a moat around your life castle. You’ll end up becoming a prisoner and merely exist instead of live. Peep around corners. Hide. Play it safe. Or you can live fearlessly and you will fall and trip and get hurt. And people will hurt you. One hundred percent. And every time they do, you have a choice. Dig that moat or go out of your castle and run free. If you choose to leave your safe fortress, you will learn, grow, and evolve. But most importantly, feel something. Because that’s what life is about.

Our hearts were meant to get broken.

They were meant to shatter.

That’s what makes them stronger.

That’s what makes us human.

This post was originally published here and is republished with permission from the author.

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The post 7 Dating Do’s and Don’ts! appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2GlYnI3

Vic and Rita Have a run in With a Weird Fellow in ‘Hair Patrol’

hair patrol, doom patrol, tv show, action, adventure, comedy, drama, season 1, review, dc universe, warner bros television

A rather odd man shows up at the mansion in ‘Hair Patrol’

Last time on Doom Patrol, Cliff took an unexpected trip to the underground. There he met some of Jane’s personalities, and they weren’t that happy to see him. Jane was unsure what to do next, and got some bad advice from a weird looking being. It was up to Cliff to try and stop her, but it wasn’t going to be easy. As the episode came to a close he was able to save her, and learned something big about her. We get to see Rita and Vic have a run in with a strange person in ‘Hair Patrol’. I was able to watch a screener of this episode and here is what I thought of it.

hair patrol, doom patrol, tv show, action, adventure, comedy, drama, season 1, review, dc universe, warner bros television

(c) Warner Bros Television

You can read the premise for ‘Hair Patrol’ here:

Vic and Rita find the mansion infiltrated by Ernest Franklin, a dangerous man called The Beard Hunter, who’s been activated by the Bureau of Normalcy to find Niles Caulder. Meanwhile, we learn the tragic love story between Caulder and an immortal woman named Slava that started Niles on the path towards the man we know today.

hair patrol, doom patrol, tv show, action, adventure, comedy, drama, season 1, review, dc universe, warner bros television

(c) Warner Bros Television

See Vic and Rita deal with a strange person in ‘Hair Patrol’. They have come to the mansion, and refuse to leave until the are told where someone is. Along the way we get to see what their power is, and it is rather odd. They seem like just a weird person, but they are stronger than you think. Viewers also get to see an incident from Niles Caulder’s past that changed him forever once it was all over. As this episode came to a close this person ended up somewhere and had a run in with a powerful beast.

hair patrol, doom patrol, tv show, action, adventure, comedy, drama, season 1, review, dc universe, warner bros television

(c) Warner Bros Television

Doom Patrol ‘Hair Patrol’ is available now on DC Universe. You can follow this show on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

The post Vic and Rita Have a run in With a Weird Fellow in ‘Hair Patrol’ appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2ULRERJ