Pokemon Company International and Wicked Cool Toys have unveiled a full line of Detective Pikachu products, including toys, apparel, Pokemon Trading Cards and this remarkable Detective Pikachu plush that my daughter and her friends love!

He comes with 14 responses, motorized ears, a detective’s hat, and two voice modes: Detective Pikachu (voiced by Canadian Actor Ryan Reynolds more on that later) and a standard Pikachu. (Pika-Pika)

In the upcoming film, it’s been two months since Tim Goodman’s father went missing while on a case in Ryme city, and this teen takes it upon himself to find out what happened.

Tim runs into Detective Pikachu a snarky adorable rogue and realizes he’s the only one who can hear the Pokemon speak.

Their special circumstance is a big underlying mystery of Detective Pikachu, and it lends to funny moments between the two early on as they try to hide their conversations.

With their bond formed, Pikachu teams up with Tim to find his father.


As excitement continues to build toward the May 10, 2019, theatrical release of POKÉMON Detective Pikachu Wicked Cool Toys is supplying this substantial movie tie-in and collector’s item at select retailers! 

In this hilarious clip, “Detective Pikachu” Ryan Reynolds sits down for an interview on “Outside the Actors Studio” to talk about how he got into the titular role.

In the hilarious clip, Reynolds describes how he “spent the entire year” in character as Pikachu to fully inhabit him on screen.


I was on my way to pick up my daughters from school when I heard that I got the role. I didn’t show up at [the] school because Detective Pikachu, he doesn’t know who those two little girls are,” Reynolds says. “Who are they?


Available from @wickedcooltoys POKÉMON DETECTIVE PIKACHU can interact with you just like in the movie!

My daughter and a friend enjoyed the unpredictable responses from the articulations of Pikachu’s ears and motions and voice actor Ryan Reynolds deadpan delivery amuses them to no end.

The funniest line ever- “Nice work kid, maybe there’s a little detective in you after all!”

This plushie seemed to be sensitive to motions or movements near it, it would deliver one-liners unbidden at times and the spontaneous chit chat was very much in character for Ryan Reynolds who’s irreverent humor really takes this toy to another level. 

With the resurgence of POKEMON in all aspects of media, coupled with Ryan Reynolds massive mainstream & geek following, this toy is potentially this summers most sought after movie tie in collectible!

Bottom Line:

This is an exceptional collectible movie tie in for Pokemon fans in general and Pikachu fans in particular. The actual voice of Reynolds and the quality of the details on the soft sturdy plush make it a great value and it’s safe for kids 3+ who will be delighted with an interactive friend straight from the film!

I highly recommend picking up POKÉMON Detective Pikachu Talking Plushie! Look up wickedcooltoys.com to find out availability for this and other POKEMON Products available now and the coming months! 

See Detective Pikachu May 10tn!

Images courtesy of the author/Wicked Cool Toys

The post POKÉMON DETECTIVE PIKACHU MOVIE FEATURE PLUSH-Ryan Reynolds: Becoming Pikachu appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2IuHNcs

David Alan Balcarras: It’s Not Your Fault

The Bristlecone Project is an awareness campaign of 1in6.org. Photographs and text by David Lisak, Ph.D.

For David, the path to healing began when he watched a TV report on a sexual abuse scandal. Men – survivors of sexual abuse – were talking openly about their experiences. “I remember sitting in the chair and not being able to breathe.”

It is a measure of the distance that David has traveled that he speaks these words as three video cameras record his Bristlecone interview. The men he witnessed sharing their stories triggered a tectonic shift. What he had for so long seen through the lens of his shame and self-blame he now had a name for: “sexual abuse.” At the next session with the counselor who was helping him deal with the breakup of his marriage, David stopped breathing as he uttered those words. His counselor told him to take a deep breath, and then said, “It – was – not – your – fault.”

In the years that followed, David came to understand that the legacies of the abuse had infiltrated his intimate relationships and his capacity of friendships. He had been living behind a wall that had separated him from a threatening world. “For most of my life I was hiding under the table so that nobody could see me.”

Raised in the Anglican Church, David struggled with the idea that he was worthy of God’s love. With time, he opened his heart to a new vision of God. During a spiritual retreat, he found himself lying on the floor, eyes closed, immobile. A woman came and knelt beside him and whispered, “Come out from under the table, little boy.” She could not have known that David had lived with the internal metaphor of the protective table for decades. Her words were a reconnection.

Originally posted on 1in6.org

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The post David Alan Balcarras: It’s Not Your Fault appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2vecFVW

8 Things You Should Learn Before Getting Married

Marriage is not easy, but nearly everyone will tell you that. They’ll tell you to remain devoted to your partner in body and mind. They might tell you active and open communication is key. Others might suggest you should always retain time for yourselves, like going on dates even after you have kids. The point is, there’s lots of advice floating around, and a lot of it feels very samey.

That doesn’t necessarily mean the cliche advice isn’t valuable. Anyone who’s married knows a lot of this stuff holds weight. But what are some of the things people don’t talk about it?

More specifically, what are some things the man should bring to the table? What should you know before going in?

1. Learn to Cook

You might have dabbled in the past with cooking a meal here or there, and that’s cool, it’s good practice for what lies ahead. But when you’re married, you’ll need to know how to cook, or more importantly how to cook substantial meals, apart from heating things up on the stove or in the microwave. Besides, women get turned on by watching men cook — it’s a thing.

This seems incredibly cliche, but it’s true that a lot of men retain the idea that only women in the household should cook. Even if that sentiment were true, it’s simply not going to be possible all the time. Just wait until you have kids running around and your spouse or partner is busy. Heck, there will be times your partner doesn’t even feel like cooking or have the energy. In those cases, if you want to eat you have no choice but to make food yourself.

Point being, learn to cook — the earlier, the better. Start with smaller simple recipes and work your way to more advanced stuff once you feel comfortable. After all, it’s not hard to toss some pasta in boiling water or grill up some sausage, onions and peppers.

As a bonus, learn how to clean effectively too.

2. Learn to Fly Solo

Just like with cooking, there will be times you need to step up and handle your responsibilities. If your partner is away for the day or evening, you’ll need to watch and spend time with your kids, alone. If your spouse is taking an extended trip, you’ll need to clean, do laundry and wash your own dishes.

It’s funny because this sounds so ridiculously simple until you’re in the moment and you need to handle your business. Don’t become dependent on your partner no matter how easy it is to do, because there will be times you need to step up.

3. Learn How to Fix Things

If you’re not a tradesman or handyman, it’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking you can always call a repairman for help. While that’s certainly true, there are always factors that limit support. You may not have the funds to pay for a professional service. During emergencies, you may not have the time to wait around for a handyman to get things under control.

Advanced plumbing and electrical projects should be left to the professionals, obviously, but there are things you can and should learn how to do. For example, learning how to turn the main water valve off is crucial, especially on long trips away from your home. It’s also vital if there’s ever a major leak or failure somewhere. The same is true of the main electrical breaker — you must know where it is and how to turn off the power to certain areas.

If you don’t already, learn how to hammer a nail. Learn how to hang up pictures and mount things to studs in the wall. Learn how to fix holes in drywall and plaster. Learn how to paint.

4. Learn to Budget

It helps if your partner knows how to budget too, but you must absolutely know how to yourself. Budgeting is key to a healthy, happy lifestyle. It doesn’t matter how much money you make, without a budget you’ll spend frivolously and the money disappears fast.

That also means you’ll need to learn how to save money, and when not to spend. Needs should always take priority over wants, especially bills.

5. Learn to Be Selfless

This is not a drag on men, in general, nor is it a drag on any one individual. Before serious relationships, we are all used to doing things for ourselves. It’s hard to change that pattern when you enter a lengthy companionship or marriage, but if you wish to survive, you must. You cannot always think of yourself, your wants and your time.

If you love binge-watching shows and movies, great, but you’ll spend a lot of your time watching content that your partner wants to watch as well. Love playing games and your partner doesn’t? You’ll find you need to spend time away from your favorite games and instead do things they love to do too.

This is something that seems obvious on paper but is not immediately apparent in real life until you experience it. The earlier you learn to be more selfless for those you love, the better.

6. Know When to Get Help

Sometimes, you need to seek professional help. It’s important that you understand your own capabilities and limitations and that you know exactly when it’s okay to get assistance. It’s not just about practical things either. You might need to visit a doctor or mental health professional. You might need to take the car to an auto repair shop, seek help with your diet or visit a marriage counselor.

The important takeaway is that it’s okay to get some help — that doesn’t make you weak — and it’s both smart and necessary to know when it’s time to get some.

7. Learn True Romance

Blame rom-coms for the many misconceptions about love and romance. A strong relationship will look nothing like it does in the movies, and neither will displaying that love to your partner. Sure, the occasional bouquet of flowers or expensive jewelry is always welcome, but that should never be the only way you display your affection.

Spend time learning what true romance means for your partner. Maybe they would prefer if you cleaned the house for them. Maybe they want some help with the laundry or the kids. Maybe they want a day to themselves away from all the normal stresses of life. Romance is different for everyone, as is what people value and appreciate. Spend time learning your partner and understand what they want out of the relationship. It will help you big time in the long run.

8. Learn to Share

Naturally, your marriage will require you to share a wide variety of things from finances and physical space to your free time. It’s nearly impossible to keep things completely equal, so that’s not what you should go for. But it’s not impossible to share and remain considerate of your partner.

This tip has far-reaching boundaries. You might share the last of the ice cream. You might spend time doing an activity your partner prefers over what you want to do. You might sacrifice a purchase you wanted, to make room for your partner’s wants or needs. Maybe you compromise and choose a vacation spot you’ll both love?

When you enter a relationship, you essentially agree to share yourself with that person, for as long as you live. That also means everything that’s yours is theirs and vice versa.

Learn These Tips, Now

If you plan to get married soon, you still have some time. If you’re not planning to get married soon, then you have plenty of time. Either way, learn these tips as soon as possible. The earlier you come to grips with what you have to do and make it happen, the better off you’ll be. These things are not just about improving your happiness and health, they’re also about making life great for the one you love.

The post 8 Things You Should Learn Before Getting Married appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2Iv165M

Question: ‘I Have Sex With Men Because My Wife is an Alcoholic. What Should I Do?’

Can you give me advice? I’m in my mid-60s, married for over thirty years. I always had a good sex life with my wife but also enjoyed sex with men on the down low.  She busted me a couple of years ago when she found my Craig’s List searches on my computer.  She said I could continue to have sex with men, but never without her knowing, and she even suggested having a 3-way. She’s alcoholic, and her drunken stupors, being overweight, and poor self-esteem pushed me into my carnal desires! She said today she’ll quit drinking if I give up having sex with men. Our three kids are raised and know the situation. But I’m so confused! I don’t want to turn into an old gay man, but am I already?

This is a complicated situation, and life is full of predicaments where there don’t appear to be any good choices.  It can feel very hopeless at times. As I mentioned in my book, Finally Out, I also had a good sex life with my wife, although I know now (as does she) that it wasn’t as good as we thought back then.

I think there are two separate issues here and they need independent decisions:

  • Do you want to remain married to your wife if she continues to drink?
  • Do you remain sexually attracted to women (not just your wife?)

It is a mistake to attribute your attraction to men to your wife’s drinking.  Sexuality is just a part of who you are.  If you found her more attractive, if she became more self-confident, and if she began to recover from her alcoholism, your desire for sex with men most likely would remain.

I’m just guessing, but I’d be willing to bet that she thinks she drinks because you’re unfaithful, and that gives her an excuse not to commit to sobriety. But her decision for sobriety must not be contingent upon you; it must be about the impacts of her drinking. You’re making your decision about sex with men contingent upon her changing, and she may be making her decision to stop drinking based upon your changing.  That never works.  Each of you must decide if you wish to change regardless of the decision of the other.

I’m not a big believer in three-way sex. Usually one person feels left out, and in this case, it would likely be your wife.  That is my opinion; others may disagree.

What’s so bad about being an old, gay man?  As I wrote in “The Opportunities of Aging,” I am old and gay, and life is good.  I think your fears of being gay and old are based on the stereotypes of homosexuality and aging.  Those stereotypes won’t change for you until you meet some healthy, older, gay men, and you probably won’t find them on Craig’s List.  In many cases, that kind of sexual activity only reinforces the negative stereotypes.  I’m not being judgmental here on what you’re doing, but anonymous sex with casual partners is not only risky because of HIV, but it usually doesn’t provide opportunities to meet men in more psychologically intimate ways.

I have seen many men who come out late in life that lead happy lives.  You are not too old if that is what you choose to do.  My recommendation for you would be to meet some gay and bisexual men socially, not sexually, and then see where that takes you.  As we age, these friendships are more important than sexual ones.

All relationships can be re-negotiated.  But I believe you must separate out the two issues of your sexuality and her alcoholism to be successful at resolving this situation.

Do you want to come out as gay?  Does she want to come out as an alcoholic?

Previously published on Loren Olson

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The post Question: ‘I Have Sex With Men Because My Wife is an Alcoholic. What Should I Do?’ appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2UqDgt2

Here Are 4 Reasons Why You Should Have a Podcast, Youtube Channel or Online Show

Confidence comes from a place of strong understanding of self. After close to three years on radio, I’ve grown from a shy introvert to a shy introvert with an extrovert persona. When the mic is turned on, I can channel a version of myself that some say is attractive, strong, and of course, confident but it wasn’t always this way.

What I want to share with you is what I discovered on this journey into broadcast that you can apply to your life, your ventures, and your personal development. This doesn’t require any fancy gear. It does require a leap of faith on your part because once you go down the road of media; it can change your life.

1. Perceived Expertise

When you go to a doctor, you expect their knowledge will guide them to a solution to your problems. When you have a show, you become your listeners’ doctor. For all the multiple thousands, maybe millions, of YouTube channels, podcasts, and user-created content in the world, each person that gets behind a mic takes a position on their passion, their opinions, and their themes.

They challenge the status quo for the benefit of their listeners in hopes to entertain and educate. With consistency on your side, those fans place you on a platform and give you permission to influence them.

2. Global Acknowledgement

One of the benefits to increasing confidence is when you receive thank you notes from people you may never meet. The feeling of enriching someone’s life from halfway around the globe, provides validation you’re enhancing someone else’s life with your wisdom and your wit.

The very first time I was told I was making a difference in someone’s life in a country other than my own, I felt like I caused massive impact that transcends my circle of influence. When you experience just how much you can cause impact and it comes back to you, it’ll change your worldview.

“Be grateful for what you have and stop complaining – it bores everybody else, does you no good, and doesn’t solve any problems.” – Zig Ziglar

3. Backed By Numbers

One of the most exciting ways to measure success is to quantify your growth. It’s not enough to just broadcast. Having subscribers and downloads helps to know, numerically, how well you’re doing. Word of caution. This can be a way to set yourself up for distress because of number envy but if you understand what the numbers mean; you can control the narrative of the numbers.

The major number that makes most people smile is 10,000. I’d advise it to be 1. Here’s why. As you grow in your industry, so does your reach. If you learned that the one person that subscribed totally changed for the better because of you, wouldn’t that be worth the effort?

4. Effective Communication

While it’s not talked about much, having a show is documentation. You create a dynamic account of your life, your industry, and the pulse on what’s important simply by having a show. When you find a channel to improve your communication skills, you demand attention and people will listen to you. You become more trusted as a leader and people will follow you once they believe you can lead them to their wants and needs.

“To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.” – Tony Robbins

These insights have helped many people become leaders and, ultimately, move others to their best selves. It’s worked for me and I hope it works for you. At the end of the day, it’s all about showing up and showing out.

Have you ever thought about having a radio show? If so, what would you talk about? Let us below!

source https://addicted2success.com/success-advice/here-are-4-reasons-why-you-should-have-a-podcast-youtube-channel-or-online-show/

Think Smaller To Make a Bigger, Sustainable Impact

No matter where you fall on the political spectrum, many of us can agree it’s becoming more and more important to practice mindful living, and become more in touch with nature.

When it comes to living our lives in an eco-friendly way, we can feel overwhelmed by the many things we’re asked to consider, from our “carbon footprint” to our level of resource consumption. Luckily, there are some simple ways we can live more sustainably without overly complicating our lives.

Be More Aware of Resources

One of the things we struggle with in modern life is being aware of the resources we use every day. Because we have an abundance of things at our disposal, it can be easy to take them for granted. However, take time to focus on one significant item in your life each week, such as your phone or the packaging of your food. Do some research. It’s easier than ever to make more informed choices regarding what you buy. Be more mindful of what you are using and how it will affect the planet, and you can adapt and change for the better.


Again, mindfulness can go a long way when you want to form better sustainable habits. Switch off the lights when you leave a room, turn off the tap when you are brushing your teeth, and lower the thermostat a few degrees. Small decisions we make every day can make a huge impact on the amount of resources we consume.

Plant Trees

Planting trees can benefit the earth for many years to come, even extending well beyond your own lifetime. Plant trees in your yard, at local parks, and anywhere else you can get permission to make a huge impact on the world around you. If we all made an effort to rebuild this vital part of the “lungs” of the planet, we’d all literally breathe a lot easier.

Remember Water

Water conservation is not only about the limited supply of clean water left on the planet. It also consumes energy to move water, as well as to clean it. It is important to remember to keep your water usage to a minimum. We can lose track of our usage when we do daily boring routines like washing dishes or watering the garden.

These are just a few small changes that can make a big difference. A good resource that outlines reasons for pursuing conservation practices during the current resurgence of environmental ignorance is USC Price. So, take on one thing a week, and don’t get overwhelmed. You’re doing your part!

This post was previously published on LiveTheHero.com and is republished here with permission from the author.

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The post Think Smaller To Make a Bigger, Sustainable Impact appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2v8vXMA

Texas May Owe Feds $223 Million for Short Changing Special Ed Students

In Texas, I guess it’s go big or go home.

The state thought they had squandered/not spent $33 million in Federal money earmarked for special education, but it turns out they were slightly off on their figures. Off to the tune of $200 Million for a total of $233 million in unused funds.

Any state that takes federal money, or any money, meant for special education or anything to do with disabilities and doesn’t use it, simply disgusts me.

These are our kids. “Our kids” as in the kids of this country that we’re all supposed to love and cherish. Whatever happened to “children are our future?” It’s sick to think that the state of Texas decided to reduce funding for special education when they had federal money sitting on the books.

What kind of people do that? Apparently, the people at the Texas Education Agency who seem to think this isn’t that big a deal. According to the Disability Scoop article I read, it seems as if the department is calculating their fines, deciding what other programs they can strip as it’s not clear where this money is, and going about their merry way.

According to a 2016 investigation by the Houston Chronicle, back in 2004 the state put a cap on how many kids with special needs each district could serve.

You read that correctly. Texas put a cap on how many special needs kids they would serve. What happens to the rest of the kids that can’t get served? Well, it’s like taking your old cow Bessie out behind the barn to shoot her because she’s not producing milk anymore.  And by that I mean they’re left to fend for themselves and see if they can find the motivation to figure out a way to educate themselves.

Guess what?  That just doesn’t happen.

Districts are essentially killing these kids because they’re not educating them in the proper environment for the student and that basically kills any future they could have.

Nationally, the average school district will have approximately 13% kids with special needs. The federal government stepped in and did prove that Texas had indeed put a cap in place at 8.5%, leaving them short by a third.

Now 4.5% may not sound like many kids, but in a district with five thousand students, that’s 225 that wouldn’t get help in that district alone.

In 2018 there were 1,031 school districts in Texas. Realizing that some are much smaller and rural and that others in major cities are huge, let’s take a conservative number of 1,500 per school district. That’s 67.5 students not being served properly in a smaller district.

Now let’s multiply that number by the 1,031 school districts so we can really see what this means in real numbers.

I suggest you sit down for this.

There are approximately 69,592 students that because of a cap and because Texas doesn’t feel like spending federal money for special ed, will go to school tomorrow without the legally protected education that benefits them and is given to them by the federal government.

If you live in Texas. If you have family, friends or loved ones in Texas, I urge you to share this with them and get them to contact their lawmakers so this can be made right.

If you’re the parent or guardian of a student who has been denied a seat at the table because of a cap or “lack of funding”, contact the federal department of education and tell them your story. Normally I would tell you to go to the state, but it seems as if the state is in on this scam, so going to them would be no good.

This is the time to put on your advocate pants and start spreading the word so states like Texas get the message that they’re not messing with our kids. They can try but they ain’t gonna win, y’ all.

Keep fighting for what’s right and join me back here next Thursday!

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from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2XpiJad

The Kind of Wall We Should Be Building

I just got back from Mexico after visiting my family. I always find it interesting, and, of late, depressing, to view the United States and our government through the eyes of those who live somewhere else.

One of my aunts said, “How did that guy get to be your president?”

I said, “Well, best as I can figure, there were just a lot more of angrier white guys than anyone realized.”

“Nobody here understands how you put up with him. He’s a clown in a cheap circus.”

The best I could think to say at the moment was, “Well, I sure didn’t vote for him.”

Anemic, I know. But it gets exhausting coming up with newer and fresher ways to express my contempt for the cynical money-power grab among those elected to serve us.

Oh, I know that when it comes to cultural and political powerbrokers, this country’s always had to contend with shiftless swindlers and sociopathic perverts. And I confess my own indefensible naïveté (i.e. willful ignorance) about the depth of the problem.

The whole thing is just so dispiriting. I’m tired of the reflexive self-justification, the rationalization of bigotry on such a shocking scale—as if finally believing women about the often horrid and demeaning conditions under which they’re expected to labor constitutes a feminine power grab from under-appreciated and overly put-upon males.

How did we get to the point where a significant number of people who identify as Christian apparently find it impossible to imagine another person’s anxieties about surviving with any humanity or dignity intact? As if having to bake a cake for someone you don’t respect is just as much a threat as having your life or your dignity stolen from you by those who’ve promised to make your world a living hell.

As if seeking to hold law enforcement to account for the ways they disproportionately target black men is somehow more egregious than the disproportionate targeting of black men by law enforcement.

As if suggesting that Muslims and Sikhs have just as much right to practice their religion as anyone else is a betrayal of some fundamental Christian doctrine.

As if trying to understand the bone-deep terror of undocumented immigrants and asylum seekers is an imposition that people who don’t live in fear that their families will be ripped apart shouldn’t have to bear.

According to Jesus, the most loving thing we can do for the oppressed, as well as for the oppressor is to say “no”—to refuse to sit silently by while more pain is inflicted and more suffering unleashed upon those who are most vulnerable.

But this is a culture that doesn’t like to hear the word “no.” If you say no to bigotry or sexism in our country right now, it can’t help but be heard as a personal attack—which too often provokes a violent response, even on the part of those who are the first to drape the words of faith like a shield across their shoulders.

But see, here’s the thing: If someone is about to set themselves and everyone else on fire, the most loving thing for all involved is to try to prevent that person from doing it. That is to say, sometimes the most loving thing we can say is “no.”

We’re not going to “agree to disagree” about whether an administration cheered by hipster Nazis, bankrolled by plutocrats, cheered on by those whose driving political motivation is just to make sure that all the arrogant Volvo-driving liberals get put back in their place.

And I want to be quick to point out that being against unjust policy isn’t necessarily opting to “be negative all the time.” Taking a stand against injustice is a necessary part of seeking a more just world. You can’t be pro-woman and not get sideways with men who commit sexual crimes against women.

If you say you’re not homophobic, you don’t get to simultaneously pursue a world that reserves the right to tell LGBTQ kids that they’re defective and unwanted.

You can’t be pro-African American and not speak up about the ways in which our country and its economic and judicial systems are designed to disadvantage black Americans.

How’re you going to say, “I’m all about supporting the Constitution,” but then treat everybody who’s not a Christian like a gate-crashing interloper.

People who claim to follow Jesus are supposed to be monumental pains in the ass to any politics that dehumanizes the very people with whom Jesus spent most of his time, and for whom he regularly risked the wrath of the big shots in charge.

We need to build a wall, all right … between the oppressed and their oppressors. I can actually see Jesus supporting the building of that kind of wall.

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The post The Kind of Wall We Should Be Building appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2GoMrVX

Meet Dr. Caleb Palmer

From the Loft: Veterinary Medicine

Episode 2 Featuring Caleb Palmer, DVM – Caleb Palmer, DVM shares with us why he went into veterinary medicine and educates us about what are the differences in emergency veterinary medicine and routine veterinary practices and what to look for and do should there be an emergency with your pet.

Previously published on Soundcloud 




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The post Meet Dr. Caleb Palmer appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2IHo1K4

How Father Figures Affected My Relationship with God

For many years, if I had to post a Facebook Status for my relationship with God, it would have been: It’s Complicated.

I was partly raised by a church-going Grandmother and she introduced me to God at a young age through Sunday service and other church activities.

I never doubted I would have a relationship with God, but I didn’t really understand what that relationship was supposed to be or how it was supposed to work. He seemed to be a silent partner. I said my prayers at night, but I didn’t really know what it meant or what I was supposed to be accomplishing.

When my Grandmother passed when I was about 11, all the church-going ceased. And, I took less of an interest in my religious responsibilities. After a series of events in young adulthood, I was led to explore religion again. I didn’t know who God was and I didn’t feel like He knew me either.

I read the Bible from cover-to-cover. Then, I went back with a Student Bible and read it again to make sure I understood the story.

Ever since that time, I have devoured many texts that either support, dissect or challenge the Christianity I was raised to worship. I would grow to consider myself more spiritual than religious.

I do have a relationship with God. And, I still pray.

At one point, I was having a particularly rocky period in my life and I found myself unable to pray, but I didn’t know why. I couldn’t turn to God in my weakness.

In my mind, a man was in the image of God and man had failed me time and time again.

I examined my resistance to praying and realized that I didn’t see a point in it. There was a part of me that didn’t think God was listening to me anyway. And, I tried to figure out what was the disconnect I was feeling.

It took understanding the relationship I have had with the authority figures in my life crossed with how God has been portrayed for me to understand why I felt that I was on my own in caring for myself especially when I felt vulnerable.

I have had two different father figures in my life. My birth father felt emotionally available to me when I was young. I followed him around like a shadow and wanted nothing more than to just breathe the same air. He was the first man I trusted. When my parent’s split, his presence in my life waned slowly and then he was distant and absent for much of my life.

I had a Stepfather who took care of my daily needs. He was present physically but absent emotionally. I couldn’t connect with him and I felt constantly judged. I learned how to not need both men beyond what they readily provided.

I assigned those feelings to my image of God.

In my mind, God was a distant presence that I couldn’t call on and trust to show up. When He was present, he was silently judging, feeling disappointed and burdened by my needs.

I learned to be as quiet and invisible with God as I was with the male authority figures in my life. I didn’t bother Him with my fears, thoughts, needs and emotions.

But, I longed for that connection. I wanted to be loved by God and I wanted the unconditional love that was promised to those who believed in Him and trusted Him.

I just couldn’t disconnect my version of him from what I viewed as His image in my life.

I had to shift my perspective. It took years to repair and rewrite my spiritual child-like relationship with God.

It took true surrender and grieving the relationships I thought I deserved.

Eventually, I grew up and decided that I had to develop my own relationship with my Spiritual father while divorcing it from my Earthly father figures. They did the best they could and I had to stop putting that on God or assuming they are the representation of the type of love I was being offered by God.

Slowly, I rebuilt the trust and began believing God wants the best for me. I started looking for evidence. I stopped viewing the authority figures as all-knowing and saw them as human.

I stopped feeling cheated in my relationships overall. I took people off of pedestals. I stopped telling myself that I didn’t get what I deserved. I got what they had and I am still able to take care of myself. In many ways, it is because of what I went through that I am so self-reliant.

The biggest conclusion I came to about my relationship with God was that it didn’t have to look like anything I imagined or what I thought others’ had. It didn’t have to be ideal. I didn’t have to be suffering all the time to prove I am strong enough, good enough or worthy of love and protection.

I started to see God as something other-worldly and I was able to let love in, not just from God, but from his children too.

What’s Next? Talk with others. Take action.

We are proud of our SOCIAL INTEREST GROUPS—WEEKLY PHONE CALLS to discuss, gain insights, build communities— and help solve some of the most difficult challenges the world has today. Calls are for Members Only (although you can join the first call for free). Not yet a member of The Good Men Project? Join below!

RSVP for Intersectionality Callshttps://goodmenproject.lpages.co/leadbox-1531499076.js

 Join the Conscious Intersectionality FACEBOOK GROUP here. Includes our new call series on Human Rights.

Join The Good Men Project Community

All levels get to view The Good Men Project site AD-FREE. The $50 Platinum Level is an ALL-ACCESS PASS—join as many groups and classes as you want for the entire year. The $25 Gold Level gives you access to any ONE Social Interest Group and ONE Class–and other benefits listed below the form. Or…for $12, join as a Bronze Member and support our mission, and have a great ad-free viewing experience.

Photo credit: Pixabay.

The post How Father Figures Affected My Relationship with God appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2PpSCNX