Not On My Watch

I thought I enrolled in college to become a psychologist and help change the world one person at a time.

Instead, I fear my brain is drowning in lead.

It’s on all the news sites. There’s lead and/or toxins in the tap water everywhere, in school water fountains, college campuses, homes, and offices, in rich and poor neighborhoods. No one is safe. (EPA)

Did you know that the people in charge are aware of this, but in somecases they keep it a secret from us? “The harmful effects of lead exposure (in the water) on children’s health are well-documented. They include cognitive deficiencies, increased antisocial behavior, lower educational attainment, and a host of problems affecting the brain, kidneys, and liver.” washingtonpost.com

You cannot unsee this information, and neither can I. It’s time to focus on the responsibility I, and my fellow college students have to make the world better, starting with my own college campus.

I want to make sure the water I’m drinking at the University I’m attending doesn’t cause long term harm to my body and make me or other students sick.

This is a tall order and I cannot do it myself.

According to EcoWatch.com, millions of us are still drinking toxic water, all because our country can’t seem to figure out how to provide us with the most important, basic necessity of life.

Clean water.

When I was looking to see what other college students were already doing to help with the water crisis on their campuses, I found a terrible by-product of obtaining clean water, and here it is:

It’s the excessive use of plastic water bottles which are an environmental nightmare.

We’re still buying plastic water bottles, adding to the one million plastic bottles used per minute, 91% of which are not recycled. (forbes.com)

A typical college student like myself grabs between 4-8 water bottles a day as we navigate college classes and college life. Imagine how that adds up to thousands and thousands of plastic bottles trucked in, and gets added to the environmental waste.

Kudos to the college student activists that are creating grassroots organizations online, and in person, to deal with these issues. They write manuals, message boards, lists of ‘100 ways to use less plastic’, and are dedicated to their ideas.(links at the end*)

I honor and respect them.

Yet, they’re activists. Here’s the definition for activist: someone who campaigns for social change. vocabulary.com

Let’s stop campaigning.

Let’s stop being activists.

Let’s be implementers,

Let’s be enforcers,
Let’s be disrupters.

Who could possibly think we have time to wait? Research indicates that this water crisis is global, and harmful, right this very minute. (un.org)

If you drink water, you’re at risk too.

I began researching solutions, to see what small steps we could begin to take, and came across two important initial findings.

The first was looking at the tech world as a first step in the right direction, at the CES Technology show in Las Vegas this past January.

I figured that with all the technology out there in the world today, there’s got to be some technology available to get clean water on campus fast, without clogging up the oceans and piling up non-decomposable plastic waste.

The second was looking at what the leading international experts were saying.

1) Water. Clean. Right Now. watergenusa.com Water made from air. Winner of Best Innovation Award for Best Technology of the World at the CES Tech Show, Jan 2019.

A company out of Israel and Miami FL that provides clean water units in 3 sizes which generates water from air, no plastics needed, immediate solution.

2) The experts: 19 best solutions to the global freshwater crisis captured by a GlobeScan and SustainAbility poll of more than 1200 leading international experts in 80 countries. circleofblue.org A list of amazing long term solutions.

Here are the experts long term solutions as listed on their site:

1. Educate to change consumption and lifestyles
2. Invent new water conservation technologies
3. Recycle wastewater
4. Improve irrigation
5. Appropriately price water
6. Develop energy efficient desalination plants
7. Improve water catchment and harvesting
8. Look to community-based governance and partnerships
9. Develop and enact better policies and regulations
10. Holistically manage ecosystems
11. Improve distribution infrastructure
12. Shrink corporate water footprints
13. Build international frameworks and institutional cooperation
14. Address pollution
15. Public common resources / equitable access
16. R&D / Innovation
17. Water projects in developing countries/transfer of technology
18. Climate change mitigation
19. Population growth control
circleofblue.org

So let’s do both.

We could encourage and support the experts on their long term solutions for clean water.

• Follow them on social media,
• keep an eye on what they’re doing,
• and see how to get involved in their work.

Out of the 19 solutions they list, if I were thirsty right now, or wanted a drink of water with my lunch, to take to class or after a workout, none of the 19 solutions would give you or me a glass of clean water today.

As a small first step towards having clean water on our college campuses:

We could have the plastic-free, self-sustaining source of renewable, fresh, clean drinking water available to us through watergenusa.com in the form of water generators all over our campuses, and use recyclable bottles to fill up on clean, filtered, water.

There’s finally a plastic-free alternative to water bottles that students can promote and make a real impact on both having clean water, reducing plastic waste.

We know about solutions.

We’re the changemakers. So let’s make changes.

What’s Next? Talk with others. Take action.

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The post Not On My Watch appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2V55MVC

How Unexpected Love Tore Me Down and Built Me Up Stronger Than Ever

When true love walked into my life, it was not the Hollywood swoon-worthy meet-cute that filled my dreams.

Instead, love completely turned my world on its head and made me question everything— especially myself.

Before love, I spent time in nature and reading books. I biked my kids to school and went to work. I shopped for groceries on the weekend and kissed my wife goodnight.

Any onlooker would’ve thought I had it all, but there was something missing.

I had become exactly what I was supposed to be—a “good man” who takes care of his family, goes to work, doesn’t complain, and loses sight of his dreams.

That was until love freed me.

In the summer of 2015, I met an amazing, magical woman online. I was not open to getting involved romantically, nor was she.

I was married. Period.

As our friendship developed, it was like pieces of myself were unlocking. Pieces I thought I could live without.

I was wrong.

Confused by what was happening within me, our bond deepened.

I felt I had met the woman I had always dreamt about, but never thought I would meet in real life (not THIS lifetime anyway).

I had given up on myself.

Once I was able to truly take in and acknowledge the complexity of my feelings, I filed for a divorce.

And then I broke down.

There I was, on the floor, not even able to get myself together and “man up”.

There SHE was, my unexpected love, taking care of me.

I HAD to step up.

This woman deserved the best of me. She deserved the man that I was but lost track of. I wanted to be present for her.

A love like this can tear a man down and ignite an urge in him so powerful, that the only thing to do, is to forge a new version from scratch.

So I deconstructed the man I thought I had to be for all those years and rebuilt myself into the stronger, more authentic man I am today.

In order to get there, I had to break through old beliefs and release patterns holding me back. Here is how I opened up my heart to new opportunities and new wisdom.

#1 Trust The Universe & Find Your Alignment:

When you’re facing tough choices and you don’t know what to do, all you can do is trust in something greater than yourself and align with the most true decision.

I had to choose between exploring a love I had only dreamt of or staying with my former wife, knowing my feelings weren’t as complete as she deserved.

I was stuck between duty and truth. And even though what was true was painful for everyone, so was living for duty, which only kept everyone unfulfilled.

When you find yourself lost on your path, trust and align your actions with the truth.

When you do that, you will begin to see yourself and the world differently. You will begin to view alleged failures or let downs as beacons along the way guiding you toward the place where you can realize all of your desires.

#2 Dare To Go Deep & Refuse To Settle:

When you perceive your life as an ongoing struggle (or the thing that you have to settle for), then that is exactly what will continue to show up in your life.

To break the patterns of struggle and settling, you have to go deep—really deep—to meet your shadow.

After I filed for divorce, it was incredibly hard and deeply painful. I felt shredded. Putting my wife and my kids through the excruciating pain of a breakup, I felt so much guilt, that it almost gutted me completely.

It has been, without a doubt, the most heart-wrenching thing I have ever done in my entire life and hurled me into a physical and emotional burn-out, which is where I met my shadow.

When your shadow remains unconscious, it creates chaos in your life. Suppressed feelings do not simply dissipate, but rather they tend to take over your conscious being, wield power over your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.

There’s a great depth to shadow work, but to get started, focus on a feeling that comes up for you over and over again. It can be from your childhood or in your current relationship.

What does that feeling mean to you? Why is it there? How is it showing up in your life? What beliefs have you created out of that feeling? Are those beliefs true? Does it serve you to let those beliefs go and truly work through the feeling?

Journal on this and process the emotion out until you feel complete with this.

#3 Give Your True Love The Best Of You

Display your authenticity to step up for your partner. Define how you want to love them and don’t lose focus on fulfilling this goal. Be who you truly are, and include your yin and your yang. Show your courage, vulnerability, and openness.

Real, conscious love deserves authenticity. If you want to take in the amount of love your partner gives to you, you have to show them all the beautiful layers that make you the man that you are. They need to see and feel the fullness of you.

The same happened with me and my new love. When I was able to open up to the magnitude of her feelings for me, my whole being screamed to give her the same.

In that moment, I made a clear decision to be the man that she deserved. To become the best version of myself—so I did!

Not exactly a walk in the park.

I had to explore the parts of me that didn’t feel good—the parts of me I had tried to ignore, bury, and deny. I had to go to my core, break myself down completely to see the man I needed and WANTED to be.

When you break down your old beliefs, pull off your masks, and open your heart in new ways, you learn to love yourself and your partner in new ways you simply couldn’t before.

More importantly, it’s this work that makes you willing to be seen by your partner completely to create a deeply loving and understanding bond.

I’ve been with my new partner now for years, and we celebrate our growth every day. She knows my weaknesses better than anybody. She knows where I will flounder and withdraw. She sees straight through my bullsh*t. And, she knows the fullness and power of my love for her and for life.

This wouldn’t have been possible if I didn’t do the work—and the work was not easy.

But remember that whenever you feel fearful, connect to your inner core. That’s where self-love, self-compassion, deep knowing, and true conviction live. Then simply trust that the Universe always has your back.

 

What’s your take on what you just read? Comment below or write a response and submit to us your own point of view or reaction here at the red box, below, which links to our submissions portal.

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from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2Xhk9Uc

The Bizarre Sci-Fi Thriller ‘Replicas’ is Heading to Blu-Ray

replicas, science fiction, thriller, keanue reeves alice eve, blu-ray, review, entertainment studios

A man takes a huge risk in ‘Replicas’ coming to Blu-ray

I have seen my share of science fiction movies. Most of them have been enjoyable, and some have even been amazing. Once in a while I see a film that had a good concept but turned out to be pretty bad. When I heard about Replicas I had doubts if it would be good but I decided to check it out anyway. I was able to get a review copy and this is what I thought of it.

replicas, science fiction, thriller, keanu reeves, alice eve, blu-ray, review, entertainment studios

(c) Entertainment Studios

You can read the plot for Replicas here:

Keanu Reeves stars as William Foster, a neuroscientist on the verge of transferring human consciousness into a computer when his beloved wife and children are tragically killed in a car crash. Desperate to resurrect his family, William recruits a fellow scientist to help secretly clone their bodies and create replicas. When William learns that he can only replicate three of the four family members, he makes a decision with fateful consequences.

replicas, science fiction, thriller, keanu reeves, alice eve, blu-ray, review, entertainment studios

(c) Entertainment Studios

Replicas wasn’t that great of a movie. It had plenty of slow moments, and others that were just weak. Many of the characters came off as one dimensional, and the villain wasn’t that strong either. The plot also didn’t always make sense. This movie has a god cast but sadly there wasn’t much they could do to make it a good one. Some people might like it but I wouldn’t recommend it.

replicas, science fiction, thriller, keanue reeves, alice eve, blu-ray, review, entertainment studios

(c) Entertainment Studios

Replicas is out now on Blu-Ray combo pack, DVD and On Demand. You can follow this movie on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

The post The Bizarre Sci-Fi Thriller ‘Replicas’ is Heading to Blu-Ray appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2v8uWUX

5 Essential Skills to Drive Success in Every Niche

There are many people who don’t have the courage to launch a business in a niche as they think they don’t have the right skills and experience to obtain success. While there are specific skills which determine the success in every niche, there are also some general skills which ensure success in any business you would try.

Below are 5 essential skills you need to drive success in every aspect of your life:

1. Ambition

When you launch a new business, you need to be prepared for difficult moments such as fighting the competition and winning your target audience. Moreover, if you follow some successful entrepreneurs, you should keep in mind that they also faced difficulties and continue to experience them. So, how does a successful entrepreneur get over all the difficulties?

The essential skill you need to possess is called ambition. Set small and clear milestones in your development plan and use your ambition to go over each difficulty and finalize what you had in your mind. It doesn’t matter how hard the path is going to be. Visualize your target and put in all the efforts to achieve it. Staying organized and scheduling each step to get things done are some of the techniques you can use to achieve success.

2. Listen to those around you

While listening to your instincts is necessary if you want to be a successful entrepreneur, this is not enough. As your business develops, you will have an entire team to manage and lead to success. Therefore, you cannot be a successful leader and have success in every niche unless you learn how to listen to the people around you.

You should listen to your employees and discover what they are expecting from you. This is the way to follow if you want to keep your team motivated and help them give the best of themselves.

On the other hand, you will need to listen to your customers to improve your products and services and provide excellent customer support. By listening carefully to the voice of your customers, you will be able to stand out of the competition and ensure their loyalty towards your brand.

“We see our customers as invited guests to a party, and we are the hosts. It’s our job every day to make every important aspect of the customer experience a little bit better.” – Jeff Bezos

3. Courage

When you decided to become an entrepreneur and build your own business, it means you are a courageous person. Courage will help you harness the power of creativity. Don’t be afraid to take risks if you feel a specific action will bring more success to your business.

Apart from doing intensive research on your ideas and developing the exact steps you are going to follow, you will need the courage to implement them. Not all the ideas will turn out to be successful.

Regardless, you will have something to learn from each success or mistake and this will help you move your business even further. When you have the courage to follow a path which is not very familiar to you, this is going to be the moment when you will widen your horizons and exceed your limits to achieve success.

4. Creativity and imagination

If you already implemented your idea and you see that it works, you most probably think that you don’t need to change anything to achieve more success. You need to keep in mind that customers’ preferences change and your competition is waiting for your mistakes to “steal” your clients.

Therefore, you need to use your creativity and imagination to improve your products and services to meet your customers’ expectations. What is more, creativity can also mean that you are open to talk to new people and use their experience to improve something in your business.

“Get closer than ever to your customers. So close that you tell them what they need well before they realize it themselves.” – Steve Jobs

5. Continuous learning

If you want to drive success in every niche you will need to show a willingness to learn. You need to stay updated with what happens in your niche and what your customers expect from you.

Education is not only something for school. It is a lifelong process, and you should be open to seek knowledge and improve your skills with every opportunity. An efficient trick is to stay close to people who are already successful in your industry, ask their opinions on various subjects and learn from their experience.

The above five essential skills will help you build a successful business in every niche. A true leader is ambitious, knows to listen to the people around him, and is always open to learning from others.

No matter the size of your business, you will need to be creative and use your imagination to improve your products and services. These skills will help any leader develop new skills, stand out of the crowd, and strengthen his position on the market.

What skill do you think is most important to be successful in life? Let us know below!

source https://addicted2success.com/success-advice/5-essential-skills-to-drive-success-in-every-niche/

Should I Feel Bad for Ditching My Kids for a Night Out?

The monsters have gone back to school and parents all over the country are breathing a sigh of relief. For those that have to arrange childcare, the state is now taking care of that once again. And those which are at home now have their few hours of respite returned.

I myself join you in these short-lived celebrations. Even though I adore spending time with the little ones, the past week and a bit has left me pulling my beard out.

It started on the first day. Our youngest two have taken to competing over who gets the prime position in the front room. That being the seat closest the plug socket. Meaning they can sit and fester watching other kids play with toys whist their devices charge. You just try convincing them that a battery level beneath 30 percent does not mean that the world will end.

But in all honesty, what got me about that, in particular, was that it’s my bloody seat. And I wanted it back.

It’s all fun

The day trips out were brilliant, some really great memories made. Even the normally cold and miserable February weather was kind to us. Although the walk back from the park on Sunday, somehow became to, the children at least. Part critique of mine and thunderti*s’s parenting skills but mostly a way of making a sunny fifteen-minute stroll seem like completing a marathon.

The best was saved till last, however. On the morning of the last day, I woke. It was a beautiful morning and I lay with my thoughts for a few seconds before. Until it went wrong when I decided to answer the call of the coffee pot and the bed sheet rose with me. There was chewing gum in my bed. This kinda sh*t is just never going to be cool.

The effect this had on me was somewhat compounded by the fact that it is winter. And due to the fact that we are now in the stage of our relationship that it sometimes is ok the let grooming habits slip a little. Well, let me just end on that topic by saying my lady’s bear now has a bald spot. On his back.

The youngest two kids are with their other parents for the evening. And yet despite the fact that half term breaks are lovely, apart from the children bit. I bloody miss them already. The moment the youngest was dropped off and she asked when she was coming home during our farewells I could have happily took her then and there. I must be some kind of sadist I tell you.

Childfree!

The decision was made for me, however. If we weren’t leaving them with their other parents it would have been a case of working down the pre-approved eco-vegan babysitter’s list. We are out for a meal this evening. The boy and his partner are going traveling for a few months. To the horror and emotional turmoil of my better half however, that is another story. So a midweek banquet and drinks are of course in order.

Even if that wasn’t the case, however, I would have refrained from bringing them home. There a few reasons I have for this, firstly being the fact that the children’s respective other parents are important and so is their time with them.

Secondly, our time as a couple is important too. Tonight and at other such times, we can be adults. We don’t have to have the kids bathed, fed and homeworked by eight. Then school clothes pressed and them in the land of nod thirty minutes later. All so that we can slump in a heap for an hour of solitude before we drag our carcasses up ourselves. Only to do groundhog day again tomorrow.

But most importantly we can act like kids, we can eat crap food, watch movies and stay up late. And we have also been known to get dressed up. Try and smell of perfume and aftershave instead of the faint aroma of play-doh, and hit the bars and pubs with a vehemency I hope my mother never sees.

Being selfish

I don’t even feel selfish about this. Not one iota in fact. Our kids are well cared for. They are well rounded intelligent individuals who are not afraid to express their thoughts and feelings. The most important Part for me though they are happy.

And although we both do find great happiness and comfort in their company. It is also necessary at times to remind ourselves that we are in fact more than just parents. I truly believe that the time we spend just recharging and reconnecting with each other leads us to become better parents.

By the time we pick them up, I’m not only a lot calmer and stress-free but really quite anxious to see the little monsters. I’m more engaged and more interactive with them because of this. I know the same can be said for Thunder too. It’s amazing what twenty-four hours in good company can do eh?

The juicy bit

My favourite part of a break from daddy duties however is. (of course after being a better parent and not losing my sanity utterly) the effect that time alone as two consenting adults will have on anyone’s personal life.

In short as seedy as it sounds, it keeps the romance in. Not only in our relationship but alive and kicking too. It helps us to feel valued and worthy.

Surprisingly not because we have gone out or stayed in with some nice music and a drink or three. But because we feel like individuals. We have lower levels of stress. And the sometimes many resentments that can build up over time when you barely have time to use the toilet in peace let alone take a bath, are washed away. As I’m sure it is to many its a way to hit the reset button every once in a while. So to answer the title of this post, if you’ve ticked all the boxes, not one bit.

Previously published here and reprinted with the author’s permission.

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from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2IzzxY5

Here’s some of what she might want you to know about her fear


We have a lot of fear between genders, and a lot of masquerading. There is a lot of active fear and contraction, yet we pretend that we don’t have it. We want love, and so we attempt to override our fears.

Fear keeps us separate, by the very definition of what it is. In a trauma response, this is a fight, flight, or freeze. We pull away when we don’t feel safe, even if the current situation is safe but reminds us in any way of a time that wasn’t.

Those times that it wasn’t safe to freely love, to freely be ourselves, left a mark. I personally believe that we all have these nicks and kinks in our armor, but that that’s okay. Because if we learn to lean into those places, and to relax the armor altogether, we can actually achieve a deeper connection than we knew possible.

We have to lean into one another, though. It’s vulnerable stuff.

Men, you are in the unique position to help a woman to actually heal her trauma in partnership if you want to, rather than perpetuate it. I believe this to be true, and I’ve experienced it.

As a woman with a trauma history, and trauma to the body, it was only with a trusted man that I was able to actually begin to heal. I was in trauma therapy at the time and I was healing a lot, but the actual intersection of connection with another person was an entirely different challenge.

I work with clients now that are in lasting love relationships, but they have extreme intimacy problems because of one or the other’s trauma. I see this all the time. Many people attempt to override their fear in an effort to be in partnership, but they still suffer their fear. It is possible to move through this and into deeper connection.

Here are a few tips that she might want you to know about her fear and her trauma.

1. She may not know where it came from. She probably doesn’t. You might want to make sense of it, but trauma doesn’t work that way. If she’s in fear, ask her what she needs you to do.
2. Don’t take it personally. Other men came before you. Some of them weren’t awesome to her. She’s taking responsibility for her part (I hope) and she should not be projecting this onto you. If she is, then be the one to suggest coaching or therapy to address the unfair projection. However, tame your reactivity and don’t take it personally.
3. If bad things happened to the one you love, have compassion. She needs compassion rather than any demand to feel better. The safety and ease you provide will help her to heal.
4. Trauma isn’t predictable. It can come up spontaneously and be triggered by intimacy. Again, be steady, try not to take it personally, and be the one to suggest help if you need help healing a trigger pattern in relationship.
5. Be steady and loving. I know that it’s a lot to ask, and you don’t ever have to be on 100% of the time. But, if she is in fear, and you can hold steady in body presence and voice tone, and be loving in your voice, she will be able to see that she can trust you.
6. Fear is a contraction/constriction in the body. Trauma is a fear response lodged somewhere in the body (more than in the mind). Caring for her body, asking her to lead you through what she wants intimately with her body, and letting her lead will give her more self-lead autonomy than perhaps she’s previously had with intimate partners. It will increase the trust she has with you, and increased trust means less fear.

Women LOVE opening to a safe and trusting man. We desire a safe and steady connection. When you can decrease the fear that we carry in our systems as women, we want to open to you. We want to trust and surrender to you – it is the nature of the feminine to surrender to the masculine when she feels safe to do so.

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from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2KLErDW

Increasing Your Influence Through Passion and Authenticity

My guest today is a four-time bestselling author and international speaker sought out by entrepreneurs and large corporations wanting to better understand how local word of mouth can suddenly turn into an epidemic. Specializing in the topics of influence and success, Teresa de Grosbois has taken three books to bestseller status in just eight months. Her newest book, Mass Influence: The Habits of the Highly Influential, hit #1 international bestseller status in North America and Europe on the same day it launched.

As the chair of the Evolutionary Business Council, Teresa leads an international, invitation-only council of speakers and influencers dedicated to teaching the principles of success, and she joins this episode to share her expertise. Listen in to hear the key characteristics and behaviors of influential people, the big mistake that holds many would-be influencers back, and what you can do to increase your own influence within your industry.

LISTEN TO THE FULL EPISODE:

WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN TODAY’S EPISODE:

  • The most foundational habit of highly influential people.
  • A common mistake that gets in the way of building influence.
  • The unspoken rule of etiquette in the influencer world.
  • What influential people use as the “currency” by which they help each other.
  • How highly influential people create cycles of reciprocity differently than the average person does.
  • The important distinction between fame and influence.
  • How Teresa’s most significant self-limiting belief got her interested in the topic of how everyday people can become more influential.
  • What led her to start the Evolutionary Business Council and what the organization hopes to accomplish.
  • The main ingredients in a word of mouth epidemic.
  • Teresa’s recommended books.
  • Habits she has incorporated that have increased her achievement.
  • Strategies for becoming a go-to person in your industry.
  • The important paradigm shift that is crucial for becoming influential.

Previously published on thetoponepercent.com.

What’s your take on what you just read? Comment below or write a response and submit to us your own point of view or reaction here at the red box, below, which links to our submissions portal.

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The post Increasing Your Influence Through Passion and Authenticity appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2Grh3rj

The Earth Faces a Deadly Threat in Justice League/ Aquaman ‘Drowned Earth’

drowned earth, justice league, aquaman, comic, graphic novel, scott snyder, net galley, review, dc comics, dc entertainment

Aquaman has to find a way to stop them in ‘Drowned Earth’

I have been lucky to read a number of DC graphic novels lately. Each one has been great, and some have truly blown me away. They all pit well known heroes against some really strong foes. Yet somehow they always find a way to stop them. This may not be so easy though in ‘Drowned Earth’ when beings from another world come to conquer ours. I was able to read a digital copy of this graphic novel and here is what I thought of it.

You can read the plot for Justice League/ Aquaman ‘Drowned Earth’ here:

The Dark Knight. The Man of Steel. The Amazon Princess. The King of Atlantis. Aided by their friends in the Justice League in the world above the surface–and by the power of Queen Mera in the world below–Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman and Aquaman protect and defend the peoples of Earth like the heroes and gods of legend.

But some gods are more than legend. Some hatreds are more powerful than any hero. And some evils are older and deeper than the sea.

From darkness untold, the Ocean Lords have arisen. These ancient gods have an undying grudge against Arthur, Mera, Diana and the rest of the Justice League–a thirst for vengeance not even the vastest waters can slake. With Aquaman’s nemesis Black Manta as the tip of their spear and an entire armada at their command, they are set to unleash a cosmic flood that will sweep the entire world away.

Can Aquaman and his incredible allies stop the deluge of destruction? Or will everything they hold dear go under?

I had so much fun reading Justice League/ Aquaman ‘Drowned Earth’. The threat that they face was different from anything else, and beating them was going to push this team to their limits. Meanwhile Aquaman faced his own challenges and discovers some new things about himself along the way. There was action, drama, and some epic fight scenes. If you are a fan of these characters then this is a graphic novel you will want to read.

Justice League/ Aquaman ‘Drowned Earth’ is available now. You can order this graphic novel on Amazon and at Barnes and Noble.

 

The post The Earth Faces a Deadly Threat in Justice League/ Aquaman ‘Drowned Earth’ appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2KIcfBZ

If You Are Frustrated Being Single and Want To Become More Attractive, Learn to Love Your Life Just as It Is

I was reading an article the other day about how 51% of people between the ages of 18 and 34 do not have a steady romantic partner. This is up from 45% since 2016 and the trend continues to rise. There is no sign this pattern will be reversing any time soon.

In this period of technology and online dating, it is hard to pin down why this is a growing concern for young people. This problem is not limited to the young, it is rampant among all ages, including for sexagenarians like me. No matter the generation, there appears to be one common theme at play in all of this, now more than ever, there seem to be a lot more people out there who are unhappy with their lives and have yet to find themselves. it is impossible to be seen as an attractive romantic prospect when you are out of alignment with yourself.

Living the single life

It is easy to feel lonely when you are single and most of the people in your age group are married or living with a steady partner. It is also easy to quit trying when your search for a partner fizzle out. Yet, although the percentage of people living without a partner keeps going up, so too has the desire to find a romantic partner. This last part makes sense, for I think humans intuitively know love relationships provide the best opportunity for us to evolve. So, what is the disconnect?

People are pickier about finding a partner. This has to do with the great accessibility to possible mates online dating provides. This can be deceptive because it can fool you into thinking there are zillions of people available to date. Such accessibility can make a person addicted to a never-ending search for a better partner than the one they found. This is why it is not unusual for people to let go of a promising start with a new love interest in search of another.

I lost count of how many times, after several dates, I presumed I was connecting with a prospective woman when, suddenly, they vanished. No more phone calls or texts. After a few attempts to reconnect went unanswered, it didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out they had moved on. Many refer to this practice of disappearing as getting “ghosted” and it is discouraging. It leaves you wondering what the f–k happened.

Whether you are eighteen or sixty, these experiences can leave you filled with self-doubt and believing something is wrong with you. A series of failed attempts like this can discourage you from further efforts.

The good news in all of this is that you are causing your singleness which means you can change your situation.

Changing your self

For the sake of transparency, I deal with this subject in my second book, Catch and Release–One Man’s Improbable Search for True Love and the Meaning of Life. I am also still single since my divorce four and one-half years ago. At the moment, I have no prospective girlfriends, so you may think my advice is hypothetical (a hypothesis is a proposition that attempts to explain a set of facts in a unified way but doesn’t prove them). But I have had many at-bats. Although I cannot prove by my marital standing that my method will work, I am sure following this advice will increase your chances. Here are my steps.

1)   Find and establish yourself. Many of us go through life not knowing ourselves. We are like a hamster in a running wheel spending most of our time repeating things we don’t enjoy. Many of us disguise our distance from our true selves with some addictive behavior. Others resign ourselves to a life of mediocrity.

If you don’t have passion and joy in your life, you are simply a breathing cadaver. Who wants to be partners with someone like that? No one. It may be hard to change every aspect of your life at once, for it takes time to change things so that you are aligned with your heart’s desires. But you can start today by taking up something new. Stop binge watching crap or killing hours on social media and change your patterns. Take up a new hobby. Get out where there are people. Open yourself up to new experiences. This is what your soul needs to rekindle joy and passion in your life. Living this kind of life will make you more attractive.

2)   Live a happy life. I know, you think your life sucks and there is nothing you can do about it, but that is not so. You can change things by being grateful for what you have exactly as it is. Gratitude is a key ingredient of happiness. Fifty-seven years ago, I was crying myself to sleep in an orphanage where bullies beat me up daily and where I wondered what the future held for me. If someone had told me, “don’t worry, someday you will have a wonderful career and live in a nice home in Sarasota Bay”, I would not have believed them. But here I am, I may be without a partner, but I am infinitely blessed compared to those wretched times long ago.

You have plenty to be grateful for, but you need to turn your attention from the negative things and start celebrating the positive ones. I know, you heard this before about looking at the glass half full versus half empty, but it works. Once you see the blessings in your life, your life does not seem so bad. Aligning yourself with the positive things that make you happy will change the energy you emit to others and it will help you become more appealing to others.

3)  Learn to love yourself. If you don’t know how to love yourself, no one else will do it for you. The first step you can take in this direction is to stop believing the internal voices that say you are unworthy or unlovable. These voices are not telling the truth. Remember, you are not an accident; a Higher Power deliberately created you. You have a purpose the world needs.

The other thing you can do is to stop comparing with others. Frankly, we all do this and it is so stupid. We don’t live inside another’s skin. Even when they seem successful and happy, they may be miserable inside. Remember that you are the hero of your own story. Take your voyage with courage and self-value and others will notice.

4)  If you fear being alone, you will settle. The worst thing humans can do is to settle for fear we cannot do better, but we do it all the time. I remember a time when I bought a new car I didn’t really want. My kids were adults, and I didn’t need a big car anymore. It was time for the sporty convertible I always wanted, but I convinced myself to be practical. I figured there would be days when I would need to give rides to others, or when I might need to haul something for the house, so I bought another SUV.

I regretted that purchase for the entire time I owned that car. My justification for it never materialized, I used it to give rides a handful of times and the only thing I hauled was groceries. Thank God the day came when I replaced it with the sporty convertible I desired. I enjoy my sporty car to this day, but I realize I needlessly delayed fulfilling my true desire by ten years for having settled.

If you are dating someone now you feel lukewarm about, but think you better hang on to them because you might not be able to find someone better, then you are settling. This will only lead you to misery. Do you both a favor and let them go.

My relationship experiences have taught me it is better to be alone than to be with the wrong partner, so it is good to be picky and not settle. I know many long-time married couples who live far more miserable lives with one another than any single person I know.

Conclusion

There is no reason to think having a partner is better than being single. Stop forcing it. Enjoy your single life, be happy, interesting, grateful and full of passion and the right person will notice.

As always, wishing you a life filled with joy, love, and serenity.

Previously published here and reprinted with the author’s permission.

What’s your take on what you just read? Comment below or write a response and submit to us your own point of view or reaction here at the red box, below, which links to our submissions portal.

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The post If You Are Frustrated Being Single and Want To Become More Attractive, Learn to Love Your Life Just as It Is appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2KI5ccv

Why Black People Discriminate Among Ourselves: The Toxic Legacy Of Colorism


Dr. Vibe asks Black American thought leaders about the continuing legacy of colorism in the Black community.

Dr. Vibe asks Melvin Lars and Ikey Raw for their comments on the following stories:

The Dr. Vibe Show™: Johnson Publishing Company Files For Bankruptcy

The Dr. Vibe Show™: Trump’s Other Base

The Dr. Vibe Show™: Privileged

The Dr. Vibe Show™: ‘Cops Only Tackled Me And My Friend’ – Why A Dark Skin Tone Makes Activism Dangerous

The Dr. Vibe Show™: Why Black People Discriminate Among Ourselves – The Toxic Legacy Of Colorism

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The post Why Black People Discriminate Among Ourselves: The Toxic Legacy Of Colorism appeared first on The Good Men Project.

from The Good Men Project http://bit.ly/2GgNyXY